01 July 2013

Man of DBOX


You probably think that I went to see this movie just for Henry Cavill in the role of Clark Kent/Kal El/Superman and all the various costumes and lack of costumes that might ensue. This would normally be an excellent analysis, but this time there was an additional draw, as we went to see the DBOX3D version! For the uninitiated (as I was until yesterday), the DBOX seats vibrate and move throughout the whole movie, which I found amusing right to the very end. I’m not sure if my audible or sometimes repressed giggles at the moving seat were the intended effect, but neither was the whiplash I got when I foolishly turned the chair up to maximum and a big fight scene started! (I left it on maximum for the rest of the movie, so I guess it wasn’t dangerous!)



We did get some back story on the demise of Krypton and its rigid social structure and complex costumes. General Zod looks like he’s going to succeed in his coup d’état, but it all turns around on him rather quickly and inexplicably and he and his cohorts get encased in something and shipped off to a holding facility off planet that will surely keep them out of everyone’s hair for a very long time, or until the planet implodes, whichever comes first. Then the planet implodes.


So back to more earthly matters, like just how pretty Henry Cavill is. Starting with a cornfed boy from Kansas (via Krypton) and progressing through such incarnations ad extreme crab fisherman turned oil rig rescuer in Alaska and then a really butch busboy not taking any crap from the customers.



It is very tragic when saving the oil rig workers burns his clothes off and he is forced to shop from other people’s clotheslines and the unguarded open backs of vans to cover up what none of us wanted to see covered. Okay, I speak for myself. But the hairy version of this comic-book icon was a very welcome change…and then he shaved and his hairdo also became more controlled, which is a shame, but I suppose necessary for the purists.


Then out comes the moral character of our hero as he turns himself in to the US army to save the world from the threats of General Zod, pretending to be under their control in handcuffs until he needs to make the point of snapping them off. His Kryptonity (is that what humanity becomes, translated to the situation?) resurfaces another time when, after killing one bad guy, he has a moment of regret. I guess he didn’t notice the many thousands who were dying as their superfight brought down most of the office towers of Metropolis.


After the early experience of losing his outfit in the line of work, I’m sure our hero was glad to have found something more sturdy to wear, and with his family crest on it, too. This crest supposedly is the symbol for hope, even though it looks like a big S, and we get to have a joke or two about that in the movie. The other thing I read about the suit is that there was some controversy over the elimination of the red undies worn over the pelvic area by all the comic book Supermen and their film representations up to now. Maybe we can compromise in the future with a bright red codpiece like the one worn so discreetly in the Cameo video for Word Up (video here)

The suit stands up to some extreme fighting, saving Metropolis by destroying it utterly, though all the people we know seem to survive. “Is it over?” asks one bewildered office worker, pulled from the rubble. I don’t think we were supposed to laugh at that incredibly corny line, but we did.


In case you were wondering, the scene is set for a sequel, as one of the Kryptonians escaped and will surely be back to make trouble. I might reserve my DBOX experience for something involving an earthquake, though, as getting pitched around during the fights in which I was not involved didn’t make a lot of sense to me. On the other hand, I’m still giggling thinking about it.

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